Quotes

Religion... has certain ideas at the heart of it which we call sacred or holy or whatever. What it means is, 'Here is an idea or a notion that you're not allowed to say anything bad about; you're just not. Why not? - because you're not!' If somebody votes for a party that you don't agree with, you're free to argue about it as much as you like; everybody will have an argument but nobody feels aggrieved by it. If somebody thinks taxes should go up or down you are free to have an argument about it. But on the other hand if somebody says 'I mustn't move a light switch on Saturday', you say, 'I respect that'.

Why shouldn't it be perfectly legitimate to support the Labour party or the Conservative party, Republicans or Democrats, this model of economics versus that, Macintosh instead of Windows - but to have an opinion on about how the Universe began, about who created the Universe... no, that's holy?

...We are used to challenging religious ideas but it's very interesting how much of a furore Richard creates when he does it! Everybody gets absolutely frantic about it because you're not allowed to say these things. Yet when you look at it rationally there is no reason why those ideas shouldn't be as open to debate as any other, except that we have agreed somehow between us that they shouldn't be.

I know everyone here is on a 24 hour news cycle. I'm not.

The best-laid plans of mice and comedians usually wind up on the cutting-room floor.

I've always run by the hierarchy of "If not funny, interesting. If not interesting, hot. If not hot, bizarre. If not bizarre, break something."

...Lets talk about the real world for a moment. We had been discussing it earlier, and I -- I wanted to bring this up to you earlier about the real world, and -- and this is I guess as good a time as any. I don’t really know to put this, so I’ll be blunt. We broke it. Please don’t be mad. I know we were supposed to bequeath to the next generation a world better than the one we were handed. So, sorry.

I don’t know if you’ve been following the news lately, but it just kinda got away from us. Somewhere between the gold rush of easy internet profits and an arrogant sense of endless empire, we heard kind of a pinging noise, and then the damn thing just died on us. So I apologize.

But here’s the good news. You fix this thing, you’re the next greatest generation, people. You do this -- and I believe you can -- you win this war on terror, and Tom Brokaw’s kissing your ass from here to Tikrit, let me tell ya. And even if you don’t, you’re not gonna have much trouble surpassing my generation. If you end up getting your picture taken next to a naked guy pile of enemy prisoners and don’t give the thumbs up you’ve outdid us...

One writes out of a need to communicate and to commune with others others, to denounce that which gives pain and to share that which gives happiness. One writes against one's solitude and against the solitude of others. One assumes that literature translates knowledge and affects the behavior and language of those who read...One writes, in reality, for the people whose luck or misfortune one identifies with - the hungry, the sleepless, the rebels, and the wretched of this earth - and the majority of them are illiterate.

...How can those of us who want to work for literature that helps to make audible the voice of the voiceless function in the context of this reality? Can we make ourselves heard in the midst of a deaf-mute culture? The small freedom conceded to writers, is it not at times a proof positive of our failure? How far can we go? Who can we reach?

...To awaken consciousness, to reveal identity - can literature claim a better function in these times?

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.

In 1789, the U.S. armed forces on active duty totaled 718. Today, active duty US military personnel total nearly 1.5 million. Of course, at the end of World War II, there were over 12 million

The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in the Christmas classic with Jimmy Stewart “Its A Wonderful Life.”